Sunday Scribblings #21 – Sorry

“Oh, sorry”

Not my fault, but still,

“I’m sorry”

Weakness of character, failure, act of wrongdoing.

Rushing through the kitchen, I brush past the corner of the fridge,

“Sorry”, then a laugh.

Talking to my mom, I tell her I’m a little down.

“I’m sorry honey”. That’s taking responsibility to the extreme. Unreasonable.

Over-used, watered down, becoming meaningless.

“Spare some change?”

“Sorry”. But I’m NOT sorry. There’s so much more to it than that.

“Sorry for living!”. What self-bashing shame that expression taught us!

Taking care of myself by saying “no”, followed by

“I’m sorry” links selfishness and guilt to self-care.

“You’re not sorry, you’re just sorry you got caught”.

A disciplinary check on my conscience growing up.

Yeah, I learned to repent, to be remorseful.

I was born to be sorry.

Sorry for the original “sin” (the sin of thinking for oneself).

How many hours dd I spend up there at that mercy seat crying my eyes out,
being “sorry” and pathetically unsatisfactory to everyone around me?

What a waste of emotional well-being and a sabotage to my self esteem.

Cause-and-effect

Act, then explain

Sorry

Sorry

Sorry

Sorry!

A hallmark Parker Brother’s board game,
an apology for bumping opponents back to the start.

I’m Canadian.

inherently

I AM SORRY.